IMPACT STORIES
Jen
"I learned to put on a facade growing up in an abusive household. For many years, I struggled to accept reality and blamed myself for the way things would again and again turn chaotic and violent. During the first few years of the pandemic, the problems repeated themselves and once again, I felt I couldn’t trust the people I thought had my back. Hyper-vigilance and fear was running down my adrenals, causing deep exhaustion.
I reached out to Tuff Love just in time to sign up for an eight-week women’s and girls self defense series that they offer a few times a year. After a couple of months, I started one-on-one Jiu Jitsu self-defense training with Mollii and the process of cultivating calm preparation awareness began.
The practice is helping me untangle myself from old patterns and to take back what was stolen through violence and trauma. This is what my body and soul needs to grow. Today I am shedding the shame of being unskilled in past conflicts. I am daring to invest in a sense of greater safety."
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LORI
"I've been wanting to take self-defense for a really long time. Ever since I was 16 and feeling like there's just a lot of threats in the world. I found Tuff Love. I like the fact that there's a lot of support for people of color and women of color. The fact that it was free was a big deal for me because I'm not employed right now. I could still pursue self-defense, that was really amazing. Having something in my back pocket to be able to defend myself just makes me feel more confident."
CASS
"I highly recommend it for queer folks to join. I personally joined because I wanted to gain more confidence in my body and being able to walk around the world in general feeling more self-assured and feeling like I could handle my body and understand my body and the capabilities that I have, even with with my size and shyness. I just wanted to be able to expand and feel more confident. I really like the level of detail that Mollii got into, with teaching the very specific body movements and not just what to do, but how the structure of your body helped achieve those movements. That's what I really enjoy, being able to understand not only how to do it, but why my body is capable of doing it. I think that was pretty great."
URSULA
"I'd recommend this class. I learned a lot. I'm in my fifties. I need to learn how to protect myself. Even if you have ailments where your body isn't doing what you want it to do, you still need to know, and I've learned a lot in just a few weeks. I appreciate Mollii and Xica. They're very helpful, and it's a very welcoming class. When they have another session, I'm gonna come and do another session so I can learn more and more."
RABBIT
"In 2021 I got assaulted. Despite all my [previous martial arts] training, I froze up. I just wanted to know what to do in that situation. Escape from a rear choke, or being on your back and knowing what to do, kicking and escaping, is really important. I'm unemployed, so having a free class makes a huge difference."
CHINAZA
"It's been amazing. I really feel like I'll be able to get out of dangerous situations moving forward. I would recommend this class to anyone of all ages, shapes and sizes. The instructors are very thorough and really hope you figure out what to do in defense situations."
ALLEN
"I just want to say this was a fantastic experience with a great group of people and with a great instructor. It's nonprofit, and it's free, and it's really good. Here you'll learn the basics that you'll have to practice at home, but then help you develop the confidence, awareness and skills to better think about how you could defend yourself."
JESSICA
"I took this course because I'm 5'1". I went from feeling really unsafe in my own body to feeling really empowered and in control of my body, and really understanding how to use it to defend myself. I feel incredibly empowered and I would recommend this to anybody that might be fearful of their own body and not really understand how to use it to defend themselves. Especially for people that like to learn, right off the bat. If you're learning a technique and do it and practice it over and over again, it starts really feeling like you actually get it. You actually understand how to do it, not just reading something in a book, which is what I tend to do, but to actively practice it makes a huge difference."
Jannah
“I had the opportunity to attend a women’s self defense workshop led by Mollii Khangsengsing at her gym Four Elements in Oakland a little while ago and I thoroughly enjoyed it. There is something uniquely powerful about learning how to defend yourself as a woman and especially being taught by women. In a world where women are constantly being scrutinized for their bodies and they way the carry themselves it is extremely important that we learn how to take our safety and self image into our own hands. Learning how your body works and how to defend it in the safest and most effective way is, I believe, crucial to every woman’s physical and mental strengthening and development. You gain a sense of empowerment and peace of mind knowing that if you are ever to be put in a dangerous situation you have the knowledge and ability to protect yourself.
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The class was a very open and friendly space in which we got the opportunity to meet and train with new people while learning many beneficial theories alongside the practical movements we implemented.
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Mollii and her co-teacher were phenomenal teachers. They were very confident in their skills and the knowledge they imparted on the students. They were firm and authoritative while being very friendly and approachable, which made for an overall lively and interactive experience.
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This workshop allowed me to learn many beneficial and practical skills while having fun and walking away with a good experience.”
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ERICA
"I was impressed with the way each successive class built on the skills, moves and awareness we learned in each previous class. I was also impressed that the moves were based on real experience. The idea that the attacks other people had suffered were studied so the rest of us could figure out how to cope with them was not only a great basis for effective strategic training, it was moving and inspiring. Knowing the structure was based in reality and on experience motivated me to put my heart into learning the moves."
Jill
"The Tuff Love Self-Defense course will help give you skills and confidence to protect yourself in a variety of situations, including avoiding danger in the first place. Also, it was fun. The incredibly knowledgeable instructors take you through basic skills such as getting out of a wrist hold and progress through more and more complicated scenarios. You will be absolutely amazed what you can do with some practice and leverage! I think this would be a great gift for girls about to head off to college, or basically anyone."
Yskye & tess
“My sister and I have been taking classes with Instructor Mollii since we were 10-12 years old (I am currently a junior in college). Not only do these classes teach physical self defense techniques, but they also place an emphasis on teaching women to be aware of dangers in order to avoid it all together. As a young female in college, I have kept these lessons in the back of my head when walking to night classes, going out, meeting others, etc. However, if I ever do find myself in a dangerous situation, I have learned techniques to give myself the opportunity to get out of it. The instructors have a way of explaining things that even an absolute beginner can understand. I never felt ashamed to ask questions if I didn’t understand a technique. These classes have given me a new found confidence and made me feel safer. I am forever grateful to all the instructors and their unwavering determination to keep women safe!”
